Droplets
by Jo Nelson
Summary: Scully has a nosebleed and overhears a conversation in the restroom.


Title: Droplets Author: Jo Nelson (JSXFNelson@yahoo.com) Category: Angst, UST Spoilers: Season 4's cancer arc, after "Elegy", but nothing specific. Rating: PG Summary: Scully has a nosebleed and overhears a conversation in the restroom. Feedback: Yes, of course! Please, I can never get enough. Archive: Yes, but please tell me where it's going, so I can visit. Disclaimer: I don't own any of the characters, but Ten Thirteen and 20th Century Fox do. Author's Notes: Thanks go to Maria Nicole for beta reading. Oh, and to Kassie for just being groovy. 

This story can also be found on my web page: http://www.geocities.com/jsxfnelson 

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DROPLETS 

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FBI Headquarters Washington D.C. 1:04 PM 

"Damn!" Scully pinched her nose as the blood slowly dripped out. She reached into her desk drawer and pulled out some tissue. The she put it up to her nose and held her head back. 

Mulder, who was reading at his desk, looked up. 

"Scully?" asked Mulder. 

Scully looked over to reassure him, and that's when she saw that the blood had already made two spots on her white blouse. Mulder stood up and walked over towards her. 

"It's okay... Really, I'll be right back," she answered. Mulder seemed to sense that she needed space, so he stayed back when she got up and let her pass. 

Scully walked out of the office with the tissue held up to her nose. She was relieved when Mulder didn't follow her. She figured that if she was used to this by now, he should be too. After all, it had become a regular thing. Lately, almost everyday now, she'd had a nose bleed. And she'd been thankful for the few times that Mulder hadn't been around to witness it. Scully had been seeing her oncologist more these days, going in for weekly checks for over 3 months now. It was Thursday, the day after Wednesday. Which was the day she went in for the dreaded tumor check up. And it seemed like ever since Mulder had found out, he had been hanging around her unnecessarily. She didn't know if he was afraid that she would pass out or something, or if he just wanted to spend more time with her before the end. 

Although she knew that these were just routine checks, each time she couldn't help but feel that bad news was coming. She would go in on Wednesdays in a fairly optimistic mood. The doctors would take their test and ask their questions. And then she would go home and pray that the test would come back okay. But since the results didn't come back usually until Friday, she would be a mess. Then at work, her mind would just end up being somewhere else, and since this whole situation angered her, she would sometimes end up snapping at Mulder. Realizing this, she hoped that she hadn't just snapped at him then. On the way to the basement restroom, Scully suddenly remembered that they weren't available. This week they were being painted and re-tiled. Although she was glad that they were finally fixing up the restroom that she used most often, now was not a good time to have to go to one of the busier rooms on the upper floors. But, since she had no choice, she headed for the elevator. 

Lucky enough to have found the elevator empty, she punched the button to the 6th floor since she knew that, at least, that restroom was only for FBI employees and not the general public, like the previous floors. But, to her dismay, the elevator stopped on the main floor first. The doors opened to find two men standing there, waiting to get on. All eyes were on Scully as she clutched the tissue to her nose. 

"Agent Scully? You alright?" asked one of the men, after stepping into the car. 

"Yes, thanks... It's just a nose bleed," Scully said, while the elevator moved up. She had seen the young agent before, but she couldn't remember his name. The other man got off on the 3rd floor, but the young agent continued to eye Scully until he got off on the 6th floor, following Scully, who headed quickly to the women's restroom. Then he watched her walk away before he went about his business. 

Scully, relieved to have finally made it to restroom, walked through the door. There was one woman standing in front of one of the sinks combing through her hair. She stopped and stared at Scully the instant she walked in. There was another lady, a few sinks down, who was washing her hands. She looked up at Scully too, but quickly went back to concentrating on her hands. 

Scully, who was used to strange looks by now, went to an empty sink and after realizing the bleeding had stopped, started cleaning up. The other woman left after drying her hands, but the woman brushing her hair started to apply make up, and continued to stare at Scully, while she tried hard to get the blood stains out of her blouse. 

Scully was getting annoyed now. The woman recognized this immediately, stopped the staring, packed up her things and left. Scully was relieved to be alone at last, until she heard a toilet flush. Before she knew it, a woman who knew her emerged with a smile. 

"Dana?" 

"Oh, hi, Karen." Scully looked back in the mirror and continued scrubbing. Karen was an old friend from the academy. They had always respected one another. Karen was one of the few agents who actually still spoke to her, on the rare moments when they saw each other. 

"Hey, I don't see you up here too often. Using this restroom these... That's right, they're working on the basement right?" 

"Yeah, I um..." 

"How's that handsome partner of yours?" 

Scully was relieved that Karen hadn't noticed the stain. "He's good." 

Karen began to study Scully closely. "You look like you've lost some weight." 

"I... I have." 

"For God's sake, why? You were already thin, Dana." 

Scully knew that she had lost weight, but she had hoped that nobody else had noticed. She was starting to feel uncomfortable. "I..." 

Karen seemed to realized that, and said, "I'm sorry, I didn't mean it like that." 

"No, it's okay... I've been sick. But I'm doing okay," nodded Scully. 

"Well, I'm glad you're doing better then." Karen started to walk away and stopped. "Look, I know you're busy, but call me when you get some time. We'll get together okay?" 

Scully just nodded, and Karen smiled and left. Scully let out a deep breath that she didn't realize she was holding, and looked down at her blouse. Regardless of her scrubbing, it seemed the stain was permanent, so in resignation, she turned around and headed for a stall. She sat down on the toilet seat to get her emotions in check, more than anything else. Still thinking about what Karen had said to her, she started feeling sorry for herself. 

She just sat there cried for about five minutes before she heard the door open and two women enter. Not wanting anyone to see her in this condition, she wiped at her tears, and hoped that they wouldn't notice her. If she tried hard enough, Scully could see the women through the narrow opening that separated the stall walls. 

"I was thinking the same thing. Why would he say that?" One woman spoke loudly, after entering through the door. 

Another woman followed closely behind her. "Maybe he was just hoping that you'd notice him," the other answered. 

The first woman walked up to the sink where Scully had been and saw the three small droplets of blood on the sink and on the floor. "Maybe... Look Tammy... Blood, all around here." 

Now Scully had to practically hold her breath. She definitely didn't want these women to know she had been the one bleeding. She was going to have to sit this one out. 

Tammy looked around the sink and then walked over to the trash. "Yeah, it looks like somebody got hurt." 

"Who's been in here today?" 

"I don't know, Georgia... Contrary to popular belief, I don't keep a record of all the women who come in here." 

Georgia pulled out a make up bag and began apply some foundation to her face. "There are only 5 women who work in the offices on this floor. And besides me, you and Karen Jennings, none of them are here today. You know it's rare for anyone else to use the restroom way up here." 

"Well I just saw Karen about 5 minutes ago and she was okay. She was going to lunch actually, replied Tammy who looked in the mirror frowning at her hair." 

"Well, it couldn't have been her then... Wait a second!" 

"What?" Asked Tammy. 

"I just talked to Agent Reilly about 10 minutes ago... He said Agent Scully had a nose bleed and that he was worried about her. I think he's got some kind of crush on her or something." 

Scully wasn't going to panic just yet. Maybe they would end their conversation about her right there. She kept quiet. 

Tammy looked like she was ready to go. "Oh, well it must of been her then... But I never see her up here unless there's a department meeting or something, that's weird." 

"Well they are working on the basement restrooms, so that might explain it." Georgia started brushing her hair, while Tammy just watched her. "I still can't believe some of the cases that Mr. and Mrs. Spooky are allowed to investigate." 

Scully thought it great that she was about to have this opportunity to find out, first hand, what the bureau thought about her and Mulder. She just hoped that they didn't talk for too long, because she didn't know how long she would be able to stay silent. 

"Hey, Agents Mulder and Scully have been through so much, yet they still have one of the best solve rates in the bureau. I can't believe you would call them that, that's terrible." 

Well at least somebody was on their side. Scully was starting to feel a little better. 

"Relax Tammy, I didn't mean anything by it. Everybody knows they're just nicknames, I guess." 

Tammy seemed deep in thought and then somber. "If her nose was bleeding, then I guess the rumor's true." 

Uh oh, thought Scully. 

"What?" 

Tammy's voice sounded surprised. "Don't tell me that you didn't hear it?" 

Now Georgia seemed interested. "I didn't... What?" 

"That... Agent Scully is dying of cancer," Tammy answered in a low voice. 

All Scully could do was close her eyes. So everyone around her really could see she that she was dying. She realized that everyone, even Mulder, seemed to be accepting that now. And she knew deep down inside that it was going to take a miracle for her to survive this, but she had still had a little hope left. She had never heard it sound so final before. 

"No, poor thing... And she's still working? Are you sure?" asked Georgia. 

"Pretty much. I ran into Agent Baxter, from records, at a party about a month ago and he accidentally let it slip. He had ran across her yearly health screening. I never told anybody else, but it seems a lot of people already knew. I've heard a few other people talking about it too. I'm surprised you didn't already know." 

"Well believe it or not, I don't know about everything that goes on here," answered Georgia. 

"I just feel really bad for her. She started off with a promising career you know, and then after they assigned her to the X-Files, everything went downhill from there. Now her record and reputation are shattered, she was missing for months and then returned to almost die, her sister was killed, and now this. All to stay with by the side of her loyal partner, who I hear now is devastated by her illness. I think that's why she's still working. She's afraid to leave him." 

Scully couldn't believe that they were talking about her life, and to this extent. She wanted to die right then and there. Then when she thought about it, she knew that was exactly what was going to happen and soon enough. She wanted to laugh at this inner conversation that she was having with herself and at this whole situation. But only more tears came. 

"Well, what kind of cancer does she have?" asked Georgia, as she applied some eyeliner. 

"A brain tumor, I believe... That's why she has the nose bleeds." 

Georgia looked sad. "That's too bad." 

"Yeah, and she's still so young," Tammy said as she really looked at herself in the mirror for the first time. 

"To die like that, with no husband and family of your own, would be terrible," said Georgia. 

"I know Agent Mulder will be devastated when she's gone, they're really close," Tammy added. 

Georgia agreed, "I know... And I think they really make a good couple too." 

"I don't know if they really are a couple though. But they do care a lot about each other. Anybody can see that. It'll be sad when she's gone." 

"You're such an sympathetic person, you know that? Now you're making me want to cry. Let's just get out of here and go to lunch. Talk about something uplifting again." 

"You're right. I'm sorry, let's go." Tammy looked into the mirror one last time and straightened out her blouse. 

Georgia put the rest of her stuff back into her purse, took one more glance at herself, and walked out of the restroom with Tammy in tow. 

Scully was so relieved when they had left, that all she could do was cry. She took advantage of that moment, as she was finally be able to make some noise again. She cried about everything, the cancer, leaving Mulder, her family, how the bureau thought of her, and not living to finish the things she had planned to do in her lifetime. She cried while the droplets of tears poured down and soaked her poor stained shirt. 

After a while, Scully heard a knock on the restroom door, followed by a familiar voice. 

"Hello! Is there anyone in here, man entering! Scully, are you in here?" 

Scully sniffed, wiped her eyes and looked down at her watch. She realized then, that a whole half an hour had gone by. She got up quickly and opened the stall door to see a very concerned looking Mulder standing there. 

"Mulder... What are you doing?" 

Mulder walked closer to her. "Scully... I was worried about you. When you didn't come back, I got scared." Then he really looked at her. "You alright?" 

Scully didn't want to lie to him anymore. He deserved to know now. Since everybody else seemed to know, why shouldn't he. Besides, he could see that she had been crying. "No, Mulder. I'm not alright." 

Mulder pulled Scully into an embrace. "It's okay Scully. You can tell me, or you don't have to tell me... But I'm here." 

Scully started crying again. "I'm so sorry, Mulder. I've been pushing you away and I was wrong." 

"Shh, it's okay Scully." He hugged and rocked her back and forth. 

"No, no it's not. It's just that, I've been so afraid." 

"I know, I know... We're both afraid," said Mulder with tears in his eye now. 

"I see myself getting weaker and there's nothing I can do about it. Everyone knows about my cancer, Mulder." 

"What do you mean everyone?" 

"Everyone here at the bureau... I overhead someone talking about me, about us. They know I'm dying. I never wanted their sympathy, Mulder." 

"Shh, I know... That's just you, Scully. Don't worry about the bureau okay, they're always going to have something to say about us as long as we work on the X-Files, Scully." 

Scully was finally able to stop the tears. "Look at me Mulder, I'm a mess." 

"It never crossed my mind... You're beautiful, you always will be." 

Scully smiled. "Even when I'm bald and skin and bones?" 

"If it comes to that, even then, Scully... Always." 

"Thank you." And her tears started coming again. 

Mulder wiped her tears away. "Scully, you're going to be alright." 

"I want to believe that so bad, Mulder." 

"If you can't, I can do the believing for you... Anyway, it's not like it would be the first time," Mulder said with a smile. 

Scully returned his smile. "Let's get out of here, Mulder... Before they really start to talk." 

"I don't care what they think, Scully." 

"Me neither... anymore." 

"Good... Come on, let me take you home." 

"Home, Mulder?" 

"Oh, Skinner gave us the rest of today and Friday off to finish those overdue reports. He wants them first thing Monday morning though, that's the catch." 

"Your place or mine?" 

"Yours... At least for you. I'll finish the reports myself, Scully. You just get some rest. You deserve to have a good weekend." 

"Mulder, you don't have to do this." 

"I know, I want to." 

"Mulder, I want to help." 

"Fine, if you insist... We'll work at your place then, but not until Saturday. I want you to rest on Friday." 

"Okay, it's a deal." 

And with that, the two of them left the restroom and the building soon after. Mulder took Scully home and returned to his apartment where he worked on and finished the rest of the reports the rest of that night and all day on Friday. 

On Saturday, he went over to Scully's apartment. Scully was upset with him at first for finishing the reports on his own, but that soon passed when Mulder saw to it that she had a wonderful weekend. She just hoped that she could look forward to plenty of more weekends like that to come. 

THE END 


End file.
